Salam and greetings. After so many days of giving birth, I finally had the time to write my birth experience; with being in confinement and helping my 1st daughter adjusting to the new situation, it is one kind of a ride. But, am loving it to the max. I think I need to write this due to the fact that I do not want to forget the feeling, how gentle birthing was so different from my 1st 'clueless' birthing experience.
When I first found out that I was pregnant again, I was frantic to find out about other birthing methods that could help me this time around. I do not want what happened during my 1st birth to repeat. Granted, nothing too bad or too traumatising happened during my 1st born but I was on epidural, half awake, half aware and due to some complication, managed to hold my lil daughter only after 2 days of delivery. 2 DAYS I tell ya! 2 agonizing days which was also frustrating cause I saw her been bottle fed for those 2 days. How I blamed myself for the lack of knowledge then. It was not like I wasn't keen on learning about birth then, but surfing the net, I found mostly scary and frightening birth stories. Stories that made me scared of giving birth. So I stopped my research all together. And when I was wheeled in to the labour room at that time, as the midwives were telling scary stories again and again, I surrendered and gave in to epidural. Sigh. But that was the story of 2 years ago. Oh how thankful I am to found out about gentle birthing this time around. I spent at least 2 hours everyday learning on gentle birthing. I read books, tons of articles and was (and am) an avid reader at the GBG facebook. I would love to attend any hypnobirthing class or Amani class but with Mr. Hubby working at his peak on most weekend, we really did not have the opportunity to do so. But still, I practice what I had gathered through the net from videos and reading for a good 7 months. So, yea, research and studies are important and I just want to stress here that I did not go into home birth blindly and ignorant.
So, on with the birth story then. I tend to ramble yeah? :p
25th July 2013 - 3am
I woke up feeling like doing number 2. First sign of birth, had some clear mocous plug discharge. Now, being at week 41, I was estatic with this state of progress. Yay! Baby is coming soon, I had to prepare myself physically and mentally. Yet, no pain whatsoever throughout the day. Feeling a bit disappointed but managed to keep my calm. Played with my daughter alot knowing her time being the only child is coming to an end soon ;)
26th July 2013 - 4:30am
Woke up to prepare sahur for us. At this time I felt some kind of discomfort. Bareable, thus I continue my house chores as usual. I kinda knew today is the day but I didn't get my hopes too high.
Bid goodbye to Mr. Hubby who was going to work. Yet, managed to remind him to buy food for iftar as I was starting to be sure that these are real surges. Baby was coming :)
Surges were getting stronger. Timed my surges; 15 minutes apart. So, I started getting my 'home baby birth supplies' box out from the storage. Time to set up the right environment for baby to come. In between these surges and setting up, I managed to get some food in my system, knew that I'll be needing the energy and will be too consumed in pain to eat later on.
Mr. Hubby came back from work, much to my pleasure. Can't think straight anymore at this time, the pain was almost unbearable. ALMOST. By this time Mr. Hubby took charge of taking care little daughter as I can't entertain her anymore. Concentrated on my breathing and keeping calm. I stopped timing my surges as I thought I was not progressing much and it will only stress me more. Thus, I let go, and pray to Allah that it will get better from this point on. Berserah dan tawakal. It helped.
Requested for Mr. Hubby to start preparing the pool and if possible put lil daughter to sleep.
A miracle worker my Hubby was, managed to put lil daughter to sleep this early. (I was impressed! Siap tanya dalam sakit2 tu, 'macam mana awak tidurkan anak awal macam ni?' And he looked at me as if I'm crazy...sempat lagi tuuuu...haha) He prepared the pool and filled it with warm water. I was so desperate for a way of relief that I didn't wait for the pool to be filled in enough, I just jump straight into it. Because at that time, I had the sense that if I did not feel better, I might just pursuit my hubby to go to the hospital. That will ruin our home birth plan entirely. Heh. Once inside the pool, I felt much better and having Mr. Hubby by my side, pouring warm water onto my tummy and whispering encouraging words, I felt good and relaxed.
I was getting impatient. Kept asking my hubby, 'bila ni? bila ni?'. It dawned to me that my water bag hadn't broken yet. Am i giving birth en caul? Will it be longer? This labour I'm having? How much longer? I kept praying that it will end soon. I was getting a bit tired and impatient me does not work well with being calm. However, 15 minutes later, I spotted some blood clot and slimey substance in the water. Oh, I never had been soo happy to see blood coming out of my body I tell ya! I was grinning like a fool and started getting excited, Mr. Hubby was laughing at me. And at that moment I remebered the laughing French woman video and it encourage me even more. I didn't feel stressed and I knew that we'll be fine with Allah's will. I spoke to the baby that we are doing this, it won't be long now! And she actually did listen. Originally our plan was to gave birth in our bedroom, yet the baby had wanted otherwise. In the middle of these intense surges, all of the sudden I felt as if I need to change position. My body was telling me to be on the hands-and-knees position. (It was a kiddy pool, hence when I was in this position, the baby will not be born in the water). I had visualized this birthing position so much that it became clear that the baby was coming now. I can feel the movement of her head towards the right position. Syukur, the awaited baby is doing fine. The next surge, I felt the need to push. I was so eager to see the baby, I did push her out a bit, then remembering what needed to be done, I corrected myself and tried to breathe the baby out instead. At this moment, I could feel amounts of water gushing out; meaning my water just broke. I checked the water and it was clear. Alhamdulillah, no meconium, both me and baby were not stressed, we were doing fine. Another surge and I felt the so infamous 'ring of fire' pressure and again, breathed the baby out. Mr. Hubby was excited and frantically told me the baby's hair was showing. I laughed my heart out :p Another 2 surges and she was safely in her dad's arm. How beautiful it was, Masya Allah, the moment, the baby, the situation we were in - we were in awe. How Allah had wrote a beautiful story for us, and how amazing that feeling was, believing in our ability to give birth naturally. I got to hold her immediately and skin to skin was inniciated. My tears was flowing and little daughter chose this moment to wake up. Looking at her, and the new bundle of joy, I was touched - I'm a mother of two! :)
We cleaned ourselves up and moved to the living room. I breastfed lil baby and she was sucking like a champion. We just rest for a bit and waited for the cord to stop pulsating. After Mr. Hubby cut the cord, and after cleaning up the baby who had just pooped on me, I decided it's time to breath out the placenta. Leaving the baby to bond with dad and big sister, I squatted for the placenta to come out. I did the same breathing technique and coughed the placenta out not more after 1 hour of giving birth. Strangely though, there were no surges for the placenta as expected. It just came out - or maybe there was surges but I was just too overjoyed to notice, I don't know. :p
27th July 2013 - 1.30 am
We decided it was time to pay the hospital a visit. It was only 10 minutes away anyway. But before that we made a pit stop at the police station to make a report of giving birth at home for an easy registration later on. At the hospital, the usual routines were done on me and baby. I was warded after getting some stitches (I did tear a bit, because of the pushing at the early stage *sigh*). We were then released the very next morning. :)
So, that was my story. I kept the plan a secret till the baby was born. I knew many will opposed to the idea and we didn't need those negative vibes around us. Even as I am writing this I know some are still against what we did. Some are even furious. Hihi. That is why I think this is important; writing these wonderful birth stories up, so that not all birth stories on the web scares and frighten 1st time mothers. we need to shine some light on the gentle birthing scene. I believed that everything was perfectly fine and went as planned. I'd do it again, no hesitation. But, just to put our family at ease, a gentle hospital birth next perhaps? ;) hoiii anak baru lepas pantang oiii!!! Lol...I kid, I kid. Insyaallah. Thanks for reading. :)